Uni life

I've been in such a bad mood today, it's no one's fault and no one can really help but I just feel really shitty. Uni's okay but I'm so bored all the time. I know home would be exactly the same but it feels so much more boring here. All I seem to do is either go to my lectures and seminars or stay in my room and do nothing. I feel bad all the time and the less I do, the less I want to do which makes me feel worse but I have no idea how I can make this any better. Tired all the time, feel upset all the time, I'm so worried that this will affect our relationship because the last thing we need is both him and me feeling shit. I don't know how I feel about university any more. I know it's an amazing experience etc. but I'm not happy. I can't leave because I'll miss out on so much, I'll fuck up my future, I'll never see him and I'll just be a general failure. I think it might be because I've never had to be away from my family and my proper friends for such a long time. It's so weird not having my mum make me a cup of tea in the morning, or moan at me for not eating breakfast. All I get is a short conversation over text. I miss everyone and I miss him more than anything. Leaving him is so hard that I cry like a baby every time I get on the coach home and then feel even worse for days after. There's no way to make it better. I either man up and deal with it, or it gets on top of me.

I really hope I start feeling better. Seeing as I never feel happy, I never have the motivation to do my work which upsets me more. I really hope this picks up. Feel like on the verge of tears all the time...